The Lonely Wife: The Three-fold Cord

"Help," said Myra. "If don't do something soon, I may die of loneliness." Myra's first visit to the marriage counselor was one that she had resisted for a long time. Now she knew it was time to find someone who could help her cope with her loneliness. She hoped marriage counselor might provide a solution for her. 

"I love my husband dearly, but he is so distant."

"Myra," the counselor responded,  after a moment of silence. "Are you familiar with the three-fold cord, counseling model?"

"What is a three-fold cord, counseling model? What can it teach me and how can it help us?"

"Consider a cord that has three, distinct strands," the counselor said. "Or look at the three strands of a braided rope. A cord made of only two strands can appear to be relatively strong depending upon what kind of material has been used to construct the cord, right?"

Myra nodded her head, wondering where the counselor was heading with all of this.

"Add a third strand to that cord and the rope is immediately strengthened. Instead of the weight of the burden being born as half of the total weight, it becomes one third of the weight. Each part of the cord still bears a fair portion of the weight, but now the burden is considerably less."

He paused for a moment.

"Now look at this  in terms of interpersonal relationships. Sometimes, they weaken from extenuating factors, like time and space.  Then the interpersonal relationship is in danger of being broken. By the introduction of a third party like myself as a counselor, there can be less tension. The total weight that you or your spouse must carry is less, too. The load becomes lighter, right?"

"So that is why marriage counseling works? If only I had known that sooner."

"That is one of the primary reasons why interpersonal marriage counseling is so effective in restoring and re-building broken relationships. That third cord does make a difference."

"Now, do you think that you and your husband would be willing to talk to me together? Or would he speak to another counselor about what his happening in his life?"